Making An Ex Cry

Q: What do i say to my ex boyfriend to make him cry???

A: Tell him you feel bad things didn't work out for him with you but not to worry too much because you feel confident that some day he might find a special woman who can love him despite his complete lack of sexual function if he's willing to overcome his huge personality issues. Then tell him its not his fault that his best friend was so much better in bed its just the card he was dealt in life!